Laws of Life

Law of queue: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged tone.
Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to theLeast accessible corner.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.
Bath THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.
LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
LAW of the RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!
LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.
LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Expectations Expel

'BOSS"

Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document,
and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young executive.
He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine.
"I just need one copy."

Moral of the story :
Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything.

Good Lessons in Life

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three,
I will allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted,
"I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries."
Pfufffff and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted
"I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails."
Pfufffff and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at12.35pm "

Do not stand at my grave and weep

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.

by -
Mary E. Frye

Friendship Quotes

"Our relatives are the family that we are born with, our friends are the family we choose."

"ROSE IS A FLOWER THAT LIVES FOR AN HOUR! FRIENDSHIP IS A TOWER THAT LIVES FOR EVER!!"

Friendship is like a violin; the music may stop now and then, but the strings will last forever."

"A hug is worth a thousand words. A friend is worth more."

"Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity"

"When friends stop being frank and useful to each other, the whole world loses some of its radiance"

"Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say."

"Money might make you wealthy, but friends makes you rich."

"You don't make friends, you earn them."

"A circle is round it has no end, that's how long I want to be your friend"

"True friendship, unlike love, always lasts forever"

"Remember that every good friend was once a stranger"

Red, White, Yellow, Pink....Roses - what do they symbolize?

RED ROSE
Red Roses symbolize eternal love, respect, courage, passion and reveal an unconscious beauty. A perfect way to say I love You, Congratulations, Thank you and a Job Well Done. No other flower is as symbolic as the red rose and it's no wonder red roses have always been able to deeply touch so many hearts. The electrifying and refreshing sense created by just looking at this delicate and velvety flower is enough to charge the very air it surrounds? If you have ever received red roses, your memories will reflect enchantment. The sensation is unforgettable and romantic feelings are always triggered... thoughts of passion, the meaning and ex-pression of love, romantic moments, excitement and anticipation are all awakened by this the world's favourite flower!

WHITE ROSE
Believe in a thing called White Roses and believe in a thing called innocence, reverence, humility, secrets & purity.
White is for truth it speaks volumes for innocence, purity, reverence, humility, and silence, this is a great rose to let someone know that you miss them or want to be with them, it is also the rose used to convey secret's too! Just imagine if you can a light breeze from the ocean... delightfully irresistible... intriguing the mind... with it's alluring unpredictability... Well that's the smell of a white rose!!!

YELLOW ROSE
The Yellow Roses are refer true friendship, joy, gladness, happiness, hope & freedom.
Yellow Roses are a time-tested symbol of true friendship and a celebration of joy, gladness, happiness, hope and freedom. A brilliant way to say I Care, Welcome Back and Remember Me. A yellow rose can be sent to ask "Don't you love me any more?" or to signify the start of a friendship or the parting of ways! Yellow is the colour to capture the heart of your special someone. With an alluring and dramatic arrangement of these delightful and gorgeous roses it will easily convey your message into the hearts of those who receive them.

PINK ROSE
Pink Roses are symbolized happiness, admiration, gentleness, grace, joy, sweetness & poetic romance!
Pink is for fun, it carry's the message of happiness, admiration, gentleness, grace, joy, sweetness and poetic romance. It is a great rose to say Thank you, You're so lovely and Please Believe Me. Pink roses are the perfect flower to send early on in a relationship as they tend to suggest that you really "like" someone, as opposed to "love" them. Imagine a dazzling concoction of delightfully blossomed light pink rose buds, a composition of pure poetic romance, inviting and joyful... it's time to be frivolous... it's time for indulgence, it's time for pink roses.

PEACH ROSE
Peach Roses are shown sociability, friendship, gratitude, desire, appreciation, admiration & sympathy
The perfect rose to show sociability, friendship, gratitude, desire and appreciation. In addition they can also be used to convey admiration or sympathy. Peach roses are simple and elegant and perfect to say thanks for a great friendship, show sympathy, wish someone a happy birthday. Whatever the occasion, peach roses are also very nice because they are different and show a personal touch to your floral gift.

Relationship advice from Bible

It's been speculated on, torn apart during heated debates, yet still not rendered threadbare - such is the eternal lure of the relation between man and woman. Love it or hate it, it is safe to say that every adult crosses its boundaries - in marriage, or as the Bible would pronounce, in sin - at least once in a lifetime.

Evidently, marriage is holy, but affairs are a strict no-no. So what else does the Bible say about marriage?

As it happens, a lot! Apparently, the Old and New Testaments put together account for over 500 references to the words marriage, married, husband, and wife. Here are a few we thought were particularly great...
· It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. [1 Corinthians 7:1-2] Okay - let's quickly give the first line a miss, as it applies only to those singles that would prefer to remain celibate for spiritual reasons - in other words, for those who intend to become priests or nuns.The rest applies to all those thinking of getting through life switching one partner with the next every so often! The Bible doesn't approve - and would much rather you wed and learn from your wife or husband, rather than pine for companionship and intimacy, and in the process, fall prey to temporary liaisons.Karan is presently swinging between the big "Should I" or "Shouldn't I" take the plunge decision. When he heard this quote, he jumped on it, and took it as a sign. "I should" - he grinned, saying, "Enough one night stands, it's time for serious action!"
· Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.' [Genesis 2:18] For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. [Genesis 2:24] Karan's was a sound decision. As these words reflect, matrimony seems to have pretty much been part of God's plan for humankind, and hence the words 'holy' matrimony. Most of us appreciate and desire to have the camaraderie and affection our parents share. A sound takeaway from this extract is to consider your marriage as the starting point of a lifelong commitment to build your own family, not so much to take your ancestral family forward - that is a natural consequence. So - give your marriage your all.
· Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. [Ephesians 4:31-32] If you follow this advice, you'll probably end up with a dream relation. 'Be kind' - it sounds so simple, but its funny how often husbands and wives forget to be kind to once another. You were meant to be best companions, remember?Radha wished Suresh would recall how tenderhearted he'd been during their dates. Ten years on, he seemed to be all nerves with a temper to boot. She was ready to forgive his outbreaks for she knew he was facing a hard time at work, but it would make life much easier of he could reach out to her - not necessarily physically, but with a kind word, a kindly look and smile. Certainly - small niceties go a long way in cementing a marriage.
· Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all transgressions. [Proverbs 10:12] Just the same, it's hard to forgive someone who has erred, to the point where you feel used. As Tina learnt, that's the point when hatred sets in. She hated the way her husband Nilesh had thought it wouldn't matter if he had his way every time, to the point that when he eventually had an affair, he came back expecting her to take him back without a whimper.Still - Tina persevered. Why? The negativity that had set in wasn't total, for she found it hard to let go the love that had blossomed for this same man years ago when they were in school. In his heart, Nilesh seemed the same blubbering kid she'd played with all her life. Two years later, you'd never have believed this was the same couple. It was impossible for Nilesh to keep going wrong, with the canopy of love that hung over him.
Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. [Ephesians 5:21-33] A marriage is all about love and respect - says the Bible - two values that are the bedrock of any long-lasting happy marriage.
Behold not everybody's beauty: and tarry not among women. [Ecclus. 42:12] If you're seeking to preserve your marriage, remember your wife is your number one priority! So go easy on the compliments you dish out to lady colleagues.
Let your manhood be a blessing; rejoice in the wife of your youth. Let her charms and tender embrace satisfy you. Let her love alone fill you with delight. [Proverbs 5:18-19, TLB] Just goes to show that romance is not only for your youth, but can (nay, should) stay alive till well into your old age.
Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. [Colossians 3:19 NIV] Wives are going to love this one. Husbands, what say you?
If you are angry, don't sin by nursing your grudge. Don't let the sun go down with you still angry - get over it quickly. [Ephesians 4:26 TLB] So you have no excuses for binge drinking, or making a fool of yourself - and blaming it on your squabble. Go on - say sorry!
Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love. Be led together by the Holy Spirit to be at peace with one another. [Ephesians 4:2-3 TLB] Nobody's perfect - not even that hot office chick, or the hunk you were eyeing. Allow your common interests to bring you closer, or explore spirituality together to live and love in peace.

Mother - The living God !

MOTHER
1. When you were 1 year old, she fed you and bathed you. You thanked her by crying all the night.
2. When you were 2 years old, she taught you to walk. You thanked her by running away when she called.
3. When you were 3 years old, she made all your meals with love. You thanked her by tossing your plate on the floor.
4. When you were 4 years old, she gave you some crayons. You thanked her by coloring the dinning room table.
5. When you were 5 years old, she dressed you for the holidays. You thanked her by looping into the nearest pile of mud.
6. When you were 6 years old, she walked you into school. You thanked her by screaming, "I"M NOT GOING".
7. When you were 7 years old, she bought you a baseball. You thanked her by throwing it through the next-door-neighbor window.
8. When you were 8 years old, she handed you an icecream. You thanked her by dripping it all over you lap.
9. When you were 9 years old, she paid for piano lessons. You thanked her by never even bothering to practice it.
10. When you were 10 years old, she drove you all day, from soccer to gymnastic to one birthday party after another. You thanked her by jumping out of the car and never looking back.
11. When you were 11 years old, she took you and your friends to the movies. You thanked her by asking to sit in the different row.
12. When you were 12 years old, she warned you not to watch certain TV shows. You thanked her by waiting until she left the house.
13. When you were 13, she suggested a haircut that was becoming. You thanked her by telling her she had no taste.
14. When you were 14, she paid for a month away at summer camp. You thanked her by forgetting to write a single letter.
15. When you were 15, she came home from work, looking for a hug. You thanked her by having your bedroom doo rlocked.
16. When you were 16, she taught you how to drive her car. You thanked her by taking it every chance you could.
17. When you were 17, she was expecting an important call. You thanked her by being on the phone all night.
18. When you were 18, she cried at your school graduation. You thanked her by staying out partying until dawn.
19. When you were 19, she paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus, carried your bags. You thanked her by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn"t be embarrassed in front of you friends.
20. When you were 20, she asked whether you were seeing anyone. You thanked her by saying "It's none of you business".
21. When you were 21, she suggested certain careers for your future. You thanked her by saying "I don"twant to be like you".
22. When you were 22, she hugged you at your college graduation. You thanked her by asking whether she could pay for a trip to Europe .
23. When you were 23, she gave you furniture for your first apartment. You thanked her by telling your friend it was ugly.
24. When you were 24, she met your fiancé and asked about your plans for the future. You thanked her by glaring and growling, "Muuhh-ther, please!"
25. When you were 25, she helped to pay for your wedding, and she cried and told how deeply she loved you. You thanked her by moving halfway across thecountry.
26. When you were 30, she called with some advice on the baby. You thanked by telling her, "Things are different now."
27. When you were 40, she called to remind you of a relative"s birthday. You thanked her by saying you were "really busy right now."
28. When you were 50, she fell ill and needed you to take care of her. You thanked her by reading about the burden parents become to their children.
29. And then, one day, she quietly died. And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder on your heart.

IF SHE" S STILL AROUND, NEVER FORGET TO LOVE HER MORE THAN EVER. AND IF SHE" S NOT, REMEMBER HER UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

Advantages & Disadvantages of Billboard advertising

Outdoor/Billboard Advertising Advantages
Big, splashy messages attract attention. Using this medium you must be short and to the point!
Your ad has impact. Technology is allowing for more and more innovations like talking, moving, smoking, changing and twinkling billboards. Hot air balloons, blow-ups, flags, banners and other eye-catching devices are an option, too. You can even hire "rolling billboards" on the back of a truck that drives a route you choose to make sure your billboard is seen by the right audience numerous times.
Your ad reaches lots of people, many of whom see it repeatedly as they travel regular routes.

Outdoor/Billboard Advertising Disadvantages
It's hard to reach a specific audience. You might be able to target a neighborhood, but can't be more specific than that.
Your creativity is inhibited by space limitations.
It's hard to measure its effectiveness.
Your ad may become weathered or vandalized.
Costs can be quite reasonable for a billboard that you want to leave up for a sustained amount of time. However, innovative adaptations can become quite expensive.

Direct Mailers or Junk Mails???

Junk Mail: Don't ya love it?
Junk mail. Unwanted mail that fills your mailbox day after day that you must sort through to get to the real mail...the bills. Did you ever stop and consider, "How did I end up on this mailing list?" "Why are they sending this stuff to me?"
Why? Because you fit the profile of the person most likely to purchase that product based on past experience. Does your neighbor receive the same junk mail you do? Except for the Publisher's Clearing House mailing probably not. Why? Because you are different from your neighbor. You have a different model car, different clothes, different hobbies and interests. They may receive mailings on outdoor products and you receive mailings on books and indoor hobbies. They golf you hunt and fish. They like beer, you like wine.
How Did I End Up On This Mailing List?
The two most popular means of getting on mailing lists are: Using a credit card to purchase something or filling out a warranty card when you buy a new product. Third is magazine subscriptions.
Do you have an American Express Card? American Express allegedly keeps 450 pieces of information on each cardholder. Each time the card is processed, you decide by your purchases, which sales offers will be included with your next bill. Direct mail is major business. More money is spent each year on direct mail than any other media. Why? Because it works.
How does direct mail compare with other advertising?
Let's suppose that one of the magazines your target market reads is Time Magazine. I know as a small town business you aren't going to advertise in Time. Humor me to make this point. You want to place a full page ad in Time. Cost: $75,000. Let's say, for this exercise, that Time has 500,000 subscribers. So, our message is going to reach 500,000 people, right?
Well, it won't reach the people who just read a portion of the magazine that doesn't include our ad. It won't reach the people who go right past our ad looking for something else.
I also said that Time is ONE of the magazines our target market reads. Actually our demographics only fall within a small cross section of the total Time readership. Our target market might be ages 18-45. Times age demographics might be 18-65.
Your market is in there but it is a portion of the overall demographic. You are wasting your money reaching people between the ages of 46 and 65. They are not your customer. And last but not least, our ad is there with our competitors.
Why does direct mail work?
It's efficient and cost effective. If your research and profile of your target customer is correct you have eliminated contact with unqualified customers. Huh? What does that mean?
Each time you refine your mailing list you eliminate more and more non-customers. Every non-customer you eliminate lowers the cost of the mailing.
For example: My target market is left handed Italians, who live in towns of less than 9,714 people, in two story houses, on the south side of the street, own female Clydesdale horses and are married to women named Inga. Does this list eliminate most of the population? Yes it does. But why would I want to spend a ton of money on conventional advertising hoping I would reach this small market segment.
If I want to reach homeowners, why would I waste money advertising to renters? Don't you do this now with your current ads on the radio and in the newspaper? Are there radio stations renters aren't allowed to listen to that I could advertise on? Newspapers renters aren't allowed to read?The more I know about my customer, the easier they are to reach and sell. The more non-customers I can eliminate from my list the lower the advertising cost becomes.

Some gyan on media planning

Advertising can never be an expense, it must always be an investment. There must be at least a 75% expectation that the advertising will reach and produce more in sales than it will cost to place. If you don't have that 75% expectation then you should not place the advertising.

Who and where is your target market? - If you are selling farm equipment, are your customers in town or on the farm? Right. On the farm. So why waste advertising dollars that reach town people who are not your target market even though that media may also reach your target market? See the next point for more on this.

Cost per thousand? - Remember point one from above? Advertising must always be an investment never an expense. Media sales people are going to talk to you in terms of cost per thousand. This is the per person cost it takes to reach their audience. Notice I said "their audience" not your target market. So how does my farm analogy from above fit in here? What you should be concerned with is cost per customer. How much does advertising cost to bring a target market customer into your place of business? Cost per thousand is immaterial if most of the audience is not your target market. The cost per customer would probably make this advertising too costly for a satisfactory return on your advertising investment.

Which forms of media are best in small towns?
These will of course vary depending on the size of the town and media that are available to you. It will also vary depending on the size of your target market within your sales area. In many cases the size of your town will have a lot to do with the forms of media you choose.
For example, if we use the farm equipment analogy from above, you don't want to advertise to the people of the town who are not your customers. You want to reach rural customers who farm for a living. So in this case I would recommend direct mail. I can target rural routes with fliers or postcard mailers just for that market for much less than a newspaper ad or radio spots. See: Direct Mail: Why It Works And How To Use It.
Suppose you were a real estate agent and every morning when you walked in your office, there on your desk, would be a list of people ready to buy a house that day. They qualified for the credit, and were ready to buy. All you need to do is show them your listings.
Would that make your life easier? What would a list like that be worth to you? Well, that's sort of how direct mail works.
Who is most likely to buy?
As far as I know, no such list exists. But what you do have is a direct mail list that will tell you, based on past history, surveys, industry studies and collected information, a profile of the person most likely to purchase a home.
The most likely home buyer might be X years old, is married, has X children, makes X dollars per year, has X years of education, favorite pastime is X, hobby is X, favorite car is X and so on.

Famous quotes

Janis Joplin, American singer
Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got.

Anne Frank, writer
How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.

Erica Jong, author
Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent to the dark place where it leads.

Hellen Keller Quotes
Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadows.

On Decision Making: Hellen Keller Quotes
People do not like to think. If one thinks, one must reach conclusions. Conclusions are not always pleasant.

Nadezhda Mandelstam, Russian writer
Hope Against HopeI decided it is better to scream. Silence is the real crime against humanity.

Dolly Parton, singer
If you want the rainbow, you've got to put up with the rain.

Margaret Fuller
If you have knowledge, let others light their candles in it.

Et tu Brutus

I liked this article a lot on one of the sites.... it is so much true! So I thought of sharing with all of you.....Hope you will all like it....

For a married woman, the husband is the first and also the last resort. He is the one, with whom she wants to share all her joy and sorrows. She trusts him to protect her from the hostile forces. While taking the seven pheras around the holy fire, he promises her this. But afterwards if he evades this responsibility, deserts her not just physically but even mentally. Parents and friends can listen and sympathise. But within the house the woman needs her partner's support.A woman will tolerate bad behaviour or ill- treatment from others, hoping that at least her man would understand the situation, would help her. But when even this last hope crumbles, she is just left with empty words like, my husband is very good but...

Et tu Brutus?
The great Roman emperor Julius Caesar had innumerable enemies, but when the time came to die, the biggest surprise or hurt was that the one of the hands wielding the knife to kill Caesar was his most trusted follower and friend, Brutus.

Et tu Brutus? Julius Caesar uttered his last words in shocked disbelief. For him perhaps the betrayal of his loved one was more painful than the physical wound. Brutus you too?

A woman dies a thousand deaths during her lifetime. Not physical but mental. And so many times, her greatest hurt is that one of her killers is her own life partner. He, who before God and humans, promised to protect her, but later became a direct or indirect party in inflicting pain on her. When that happens, wouldn't the woman, who keeps on saying aloud that my husband is very nice, actually feel like screaming, you too, my husband?